14 July 2008

I'm Not Ready For This

The movers come tomorrow and Wednesday (and Thursday if they don't finish Wednesday). We move into the Bradley Wednesday (or maybe tomorrow?). We fly next Wednesday. I'm not ready for this.

My mom and I were talking the other day about how this is one of those "bittersweet" things in life. Right now, though, it's more bitter than sweet. This is home, and I'm incredibly sad to leave. This is where Josh and I have spent our entire married lives. This is where life, as we now know it started. This is where I gave birth to our children. This is where we've made great friends (even though most of them are gone now). I love our town, our house, our landlords. I love Germany, and it's quiet, relaxed pace of life. It has been an incredible 5+ years, and I'm sad to leave.

Last night Oma and Opa came over to say goodbye since Opa had to go help his son with his guesthouse in Karlstadt. They gave us this:















It was very hard for me to not cry at that moment. It was also hard for me to not cry at chapel yesterday morning thinking about all of the spiritual growth I have done thanks to that place through chapel services, and PWOC, and the friends we've made there.

Saturday night we went to the Schiesshaus (I don't know if I'm spelling that correctly) for the last time. The boys had a great time playing the rocks as we enjoyed tasty schnitzel and fries.















Don't get me wrong, I know it's going to be great being back in the states. I know it'll be wonderful seeing everyone again. I know it'll be fun living by the Starlings and being able to understand what my neighbors are saying to me. But I'm still sad right now. I'm not ready for this.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Its ok if the appearance of your blog is not good. The important thing is the topic or the content of your blog.

Julie Danielle said...

Ahhh...I imagine a PCS back to the states is filled with all kinds of emotion. It's funny. My first PWOC in Schweinfurt you spoke. You painted that picture. Do you remember? I always remembered that. And then my last PWOC in Schweinfurt you also spoke. I am so glad I got to meet you and looking forwarding to your blogging in the states :)

summer said...

Even though we were only there for 2 years I understand the emotional experience it can be. And while you want to move back to the states you realize it will be tough to revisit the sites and sounds of the memories you made in Germany. Best of luck and just soak up the adventure transitioning brings!

Niki said...

Tom and I were beyond ready to leave Germany, but it was still hard. We were in the same boat as you an Josh. All of our married years, our first home, our first baby, the friends and support that got us through deploying, everything took place in Germany. They will be amazing memories, just imagine the memories you have yet to make! :-) I hope your move goes smoothly!! My heart goes out to you! We miss you guys!

Sara said...

Praying for you. Hugs!!

Anonymous said...

I can't imagine you guys anywhere else but Germany. As glad as I will be to have you closer, I can understand why you're sad. I'm sad with you.

xo
Linda

Anonymous said...

As hard as it is now, once you are on the plane and caught in the next whirlwind of new things you will only remember the good parts and forget the irritating things about being overseas. And like you said, most of the good friends you made are now stateside so you have many places to visit when you travel to your next duty station!